New Year’s Eve on the computer… OOOOOHHHHH YYYYEEEEEAAAHH!

As you’d expect, the Hulk is “on point” with this comment: @DRUNKHULK HOPE KATY PERRY REMEMBER THAT SHE DIVORCE LAST FRIDAY NIGHT!

I just saw a hedgehog running at 60 MPH, I think the world might be coming to an end. #SONIC

Am I the only one who doesn’t give a fuck who wins American Idol or X-Factor?

Kardashian show got high ratings for premiere. Why the fuck are people still watching those assholes?

Anytime I want to buy an electronic product, I know I’m supporting companies that have horrible factories in a 3rd world country. #Fuck

Watched Obama speech to Australian parliament. It was the first time any of them got to meet a black man in real life.

The ocean levels are rising because too many people are dumping their balls in, not because of climate change! #RepublicanTweets

People with giant umbrellas piss me off. There should be a limit to how large umbrellas can be.

I’m going to egg any kid that knocks on my door tonight. It’ll teach them a life lesson: life is tough.